life with ink
-
Monetizing Art Yesterday I went to a street food festival with a new friend. She suggested we go together a few weeks ago and I thought it sounded like a good idea. I drove into the city and met her at the festival gate where the QR code that served as our ticket was scanned.…
-
Cracking eggs over hot pavement I love sex. I love to orgasm. I hate myself for it. I try not to. I grew up in the church. That’s not true. I went to church until I was about 8 or 9. We stopped going abruptly one day, and I still haven’t received a straight answer…
-
I don’t have anything ground breaking for you to read today. In fact, I didn’t even want to write. I tried not to. I spent my time this morning (the time I typically spend writing) reading an old journal from a time when I felt happy, and sure, and in love with my life and…
-
A lifelong love affair [Previously published on Substack, September 02023] Language has always fascinated me, but I’ve never really connected it to writing. Odd, when I stop to think about it. Of course, language composes writing but writing feels different. Perhaps it’s the facet of permanence that writing offers. A formal decree of a thought…
-
chronicles with cannabis I’ve been doing well lately keeping my distance from nature’s finest plant. I admire it from afar. I still think about lighting up anytime I feel sad, or angry, or confused, or I’m a little tired, or a little bored, or the weather is nice, or the weather is crappy, or I’m…
-
Valentine’s Day has come and gone. My opinion of the holiday has had it’s ups and downs throughout the years, usually tied to the presence of someone to celebrate with. This year, I welcomed the simplicity of it—a day to celebrate love for others, traditionally by way of flowery note. I have a great appreciation…
-
What’s the responsibility of the artist painting the picture? There is an old Buddhist parable about some blind guys who come across an elephant. It’s been retold many times, but Wikipedia says the Buddhists were first so that’s who I’m giving credit to. The story is that a group of blind men are hanging around…
-
We don’t have a lot of rules in our house. You do have to finish your dinner (well, most of it) to get dessert. You have to keep the floor of your bedroom clean. We don’t allow running in the kitchen, or playing on the stairs. But for the rest of life, we tend to…
-
Chapter 4 Asher didn’t mind the long walk to the Anthill. She loved walking, her brain settled into a peaceful, melodic rhythm with the sound of her footsteps. The sunlight that morning was pleasant and warm, casting a golden shimmer across the trees giving each crest of leaves a halo. She thought of Penny basking…
-
Reality has had a rough go recently, hasn’t it? A lot of people are treating reality like it’s up for debate, like they might be able to convince us that there is some other version of reality with their words alone. I think we’ve been over this—reality is more than words. It’s also more than…
-
Chapter 3 Asher awoke as the first rays of light peered through the trees outside of the open doorway. Her night felt too brief, but she was on her feet before she had time to consider sleeping in. Her morning ritual was sacred. She poured herself a glass of water from the full pitcher someone…
-
I watched an unsettling movie recently. It was about a murderous, young woman during the first world war. The title character, Pearl, lived and worked on a farm with her strict German mother and ailing father, and dreamed of becoming a dancer in the pictures. I watched it too close to bedtime and ended up…
-
Chapter 2 Asher was escorted to the commons by the young guard with all the pockets posted outside of Ren’s study whose name she learned was Midge. Asher had also learned that Midge was gifted in reading the intentions of others. Midge appeared quite proud of being granted a position of such importance given their…
-
Chapter 1 Through the edge of the tree line the large, gray building came into view, ivy climbed unkemptly over the north corner. The sun shone weakly through a haze of clouds diffusing the light enough that the full shape of it could be seen clearly with the naked eye. Asher paused for a moment…
-
Most of the time I believe in signs from the universe. I believe if you pay close attention, you can find confirmations from the cosmos on decisions you’ve made, or guidance to life’s questions by noticing the signs and synchronicities that pop up around you. I know not everyone believes in this kind of thing.…
-
After the Thanksgiving holiday my sister-in-law came by to spend time with her brother and our kids. I asked her what she and her family did to celebrate the day. We chatted for a while and she mentioned she’d noticed that their holiday traditions seemed to change every five to ten years. She was resigned…
-
Next week I’ll celebrate my forty-second birthday. I’ve never been much of a birthday person, but this one seems especially mid. It’s not youthful and relevant, or old and wise, it falls into the unexceptional middle. I’ll probably order takeout. I think I feel loneliness more intensely than the other emotions. I can feel much,…
-
And I won’t shut up about it Remember when the maze on the back of the cereal box was difficult? I bought my kids a box of Froot Loops, and I ate a few fistfuls the other day when I got the munchies (which happens more often than I care to admit). I spent some…
-
Staying through the raw There is construction directly across the street from the apartment my husband and I share. We’re never in it at the same time. It’s a bizarre way to live with someone. We are separating our lives after 25 years together, and we were in need of a new living situation. I…
-
Music and Time I listen to a lot of music. Well, maybe I should say I listen to music a lot. It’s usually the same songs over and over. I’m fond of familiarity. Whenever I drive, fold laundry, or tackle the mess in the kitchen before cooking dinner, I put on my headphones and play…
-
One of my favorite mom duties is making costumes for my kids. When they were younger, I made it a month long event, spreading materials out over every work surface in the house, using any free moment to glue on another plastic leaf. When my oldest was too young to decide on his own costume,…
-
The complexity of zoning permits I am not able to trust. I know I am supposed to be careful with my words and never say that I can’t do something I want to do so that the possibility remains open in my mind, but on this one I need to be honest with myself. I…
-
Braiding Sweetgrass by Robin Wall Kimmerer My philosophy professor recommended a book when I attended his class a few semesters ago. I bought it back then, but it hung around on my nightstand for a while. I’m finally on page 310 of Braiding Sweetgrass by Robin Wall Kimmerer. I understand it’s customary to review a…
-
What is free speech? I lost a friend last week. I’m trying not to spiral about it and I’m doing an okay job, I think. She sent a final text that said I had been sharp and dismissive of her and she hoped I understood. I do not understand. It was the first time she…
-
this one’s for me I have a propensity for cynicism. I think it’s because I see things for what they are. It’s hard to open yourself to the troubles of the world and not start the calculations. I do fight it. I need to. Cynicism keeps me from my real life. The one I blew…
-
Aspirations in waste management Our next door neighbor grows a beautiful flower garden every summer. Around this time of year she usually gifts our family a bright bouquet of all kinds of colorful blooms. My favorite are her sunflowers, that fully saturated yellow makes it difficult to feel depressed. Some of them grow so tall…
-
Whenever I see a bug or a small creature, or even a large creature come to think of it—if I see something that is not human—I assume that thing is male with the exception of things that I think of as inherently feminine like flowers or bees. Outside my apartment, I noticed a pansy had…
-
What changes in the present when you set your site ahead When we moved into our house nearly two decades ago, it was like stepping into a well-preserved time capsule from the 1960s. The only previous owner was a childless couple. Presumably the wife had a fixation with trendy interior design when the house was…
-
Camping with kids I bet Socrates was insufferable to be around. If you’re not familiar with the Socratic Method (named after the way Socrates practiced philosophy), he was basically a “Why?” kid. He’d find a willing participant to engage in debate and then he’d question their beliefs relentlessly until they came to an agreement on…
-
Death alone is certain I think there’s an expression that goes: nothing is certain except death and taxes. That’s a bit f*cked if you ask me, but no one is (asking me, I mean; no one is asking me). The death part makes sense though, it comes for us all. When I first started writing…
-
It’s going to be a quick one today. First of all, I have no idea what I’m going to write about. Usually by Sunday morning I know the topic and at least one shrewd play on words I want to squeeze in somewhere, but this week I’ve got nothing. Second, I am preoccupied with planning…
-
Am I even good enough to have it? I’ve heard that it’s common to view your relationship with God the same way you view your relationship with your parents. I think back to the time a friend asked about my religious beliefs and I told her I was squarely agnostic. I can’t really explain to…
-
Looks aren’t everything I was a game to them. One of those little egg-shaped key chains with the creature you care for by beeping its buttons in the right order. You learn to feed it after each playtime to get it to nap. You can’t go too long between baths. After awhile the attention afforded…
-
I feel like celebrating…that’s progress. This day has been hard for the last few years. I’m happy to report this year feels different. Lighter. But because I am otherwise occupied this beautiful Sunday, this semester’s term paper will do double duty here on the blog. The culmination of my ethical education is below. Is Privacy…
-
Let’s talk about hunting witches Recently, I’ve been thinking about the innocent women jailed and then murdered in Salem, Massachusetts. I couldn’t tell you why. That’s sarcasm of course, I can tell you exactly why. What must it be like to be living your life when all of the sudden some man comes out of…
-
Waste not, want not I made a promise to myself to write every week and I have kept it. However, this week I spent the weekend writing a term paper for my philosophy 101 class. So, as promised dear readers, a Sunday writing. What is the value of philosophy in the contemporary world? Wisdom derived…
-
What it is to think about people who aren’t you I’m a people pleaser. That’s the catchy moniker that the mental health machine appointed for the people who care about the happiness and comfort of other people. Personally, I’m of the opinion that caring about other people isn’t all that bad. Just yesterday, I saw…
-
I love the quality of light After a night of snow Blue and yellow Blended through magic water Beauty is here for you to unpuzzle Fractals upon fractals of it Beauty… and turtles all the way down
-
Its impossible to deny that something will happen next month after our election has happened. I’ve been systematically numbing myself over it for years (since the last election, I suppose). Positive thinking is not my strong suit and my unmedicated mind can run away with my sense of peace. It’s catching up with me now.…
-
And the lessons we learn along the way. There was a time when I when I could get it up for a clean baseboard. The grit of diving in and fully committing to get your elbows dirty. Is that the expression? Those days are long gone now. I mean, would I love if they were…
-
Is this one of those things where everyone turns to the right? When there are no ground rules for social conduct, who is responsible for the way things are? If there are no rules to break, how are disputes settled? I can’t believe what I am about to type–we could all learn a lot from…
Life with ink 