Is money the answer to everything?

I like money. I don’t think there’s anyone who doesn’t in this world. I guess maybe if you have a lot of it, you don’t have to like it. It’s just around you like water in a fishbowl. Do the fish like the water? I do think my reasons for liking money are valid. I like it because it provides security and freedom. I like it because it gives me the power to decide for myself what I will and won’t do. I like it because I know if I have money I can get what I need to survive. Money is humanity’s skeleton key. I’d love to have so much money that I could freely give it to people or causes that I care about. I’m not sure what that amount would be but I know it’s a little higher than what I have now. When I pass a few bucks to the guy holding the sign on the corner, there’s still a part of me that wonders if I might need those dollars to pay my electric bill next month. I’d like to have enough to not think that. But after living my whole life in this bracket, I’m not sure those thoughts will ever go away.

Maybe it’s naive to think I will ever feel like I have enough. Even the richest men on the planet don’t give their money away. It’s possible I will never get to a place where I can hand a stranger on the street a crisp hundred dollar bill without pinching it between my fingers for that extra second. I once listened to a podcast where Dax Shepard talked about how he was so entrenched in the quest for more money that he still felt unstable even after he surpassed the “enough” number he set in his head. He has the amount he needs to live out the rest of his days in luxury, but I still see him and his wife hawking products like it’s their job, and I guess it is. It seems there will always be reasons to need more. I know I have no trouble thinking of ways to spend money I haven’t earned yet. I can easily fit the “need” for an extra hundred dollars into my monthly budget. I’d hire someone to clean my house. If I had a few extra dollars, my house would be spotless without me ever having to lift a finger. Is that a worthy expense or am I being selfish? If my country has taught me anything, it’s that hoarding wealth is fine as long as you create jobs. Is cleaning your own filth considered one of life’s obligations? What changes when we bring money into the equation? Does paying someone to clean up after me make my home more or less sterile?

Speaking of cleaning your own filth, I heard an interesting idea on the news last week. The International Court of Justice introduced the idea of financial penalties for countries contributing to the negative effects of climate change. We can sue. As much as my heart objects to a litigious solution, my mind thinks a pecuniary incentive would an effective one. When negotiating a deal it’s best to speak the language of the other party and, in my country at least, money talks. Requiring governments to award activist organizations large sums, or to pay reparations to those who lose their homes and livelihoods to rapidly widening flood paths, for example, might actually move the needle on climate action. If Denmark can rally it’s exceptionally educated lawyers to hold our country financially accountable for it’s carbon footprint, we might finally discover the motivation to reduce it. Sure, initially tax payers would be footing the bill for any government payouts, but I think a move like this one could inspire a chain of financial provocations. If there is precedent for governments to be held responsible for protecting the planet, I think we can apply that same logic to corporations. Let’s sue them over the cost-saving decisions that gave us forever chemicals. We’ll name the entire earth as the plaintiff and we can all split the payout. We’ll set the record for the world’s largest class-action. While we’re at it, let’s also open the courts to constituents suing elected leaders who vote against their campaign promises. We can stow away our clever signs and pitchforks and hold our representatives legally responsible. If you say you will fix a problem for us, then you better do it, otherwise it’s coming out of your paycheck. It is just money after all.

What are we doing? We like to think of ourselves as the most intelligent species, but we might actually be the dumbest. I mean, we made up the concept of money, tied all of life’s necessities to it, then we allowed like three guys to take all of it—at the detriment of the rest of us. Listen, I hate this solution as much as you do, but we have to try something. We need to work with the systems we have. The problem is not going away, in fact, it’s getting worse, and the efforts we’re making to convince the rich and powerful to care about endangered species and their disappearing habitats are falling on ears unwilling to listen. Even the risks to our crop fields and the rising water levels hasn’t inspired action. They’re aiming to leave the planet anyway. Let’s sue them for damages before they have a chance to board the rocket. We can use the copious amount of scientific evidence we’ve collected (while we still have access to it) to prove our case. If we’re lucky enough to get an honest judge we can use our legal winnings to invest in climate solutions, relocations, and to offset the increasing cost of food for the rest of us. I think it’s time we stop trying to reason with the rich guys, in my observation people in power respond to two things, money and the legal process. Maybe they’ll hear us if we start taking the precious tender from their wallets.